What do ballroom dancing and college apps have to do with one another?
Last night, I watched Mad Hot Ballroom for the first time. Somehow, I’d missed the documentary when it appeared in 2005. (How did that happen? I love ballroom dancing, movies about teachers and kids, and underdog stories!) Watching these eleven-year-old, New York public school kids prepare for a citywide competition was, of course, adorable. But I now have the hindsight of 16 years and the insight of a private college counselor. Both made me realize that that program gave those fifth graders so much more than dance lessons. I wish that more of our kids could have experiences like that.
Dancing’s “obvious” LESSONS
The children in the film cited being able to dance well at their far-off weddings as a reason to learn ballroom dance. The principal from Washington Heights noted the lessons’ impact on student behavior. Michelle, who’d been in her office for behavior disruptions frequently as a fourth grader, didn’t get sent to her office once during her year of dance instruction. (Though I’m a private college counselor now, I was a classroom Social Studies teacher for a decade. That turnaround sounds great to me!) A boy who’d been hanging around with a rough crowd changed his friend group. After dancing, he began serving as a positive role model for his peers.
Dancing’s LESS obvious LESSON
In my view, the biggest benefit of preparing for and entering the competition, though, was stated by neither children nor adults. SPOILER ALERT: Two of the groups profiled didn’t make it to the finals. It was heart wrenching to watch the tears streaming down their pimply faces! One girl cried, “But we did everything they asked of us. We smiled, we had good eye contact, we learned the steps.” These kids learned that sometimes, you can do everything “right” and still not reach your goal. And that experience really stinks.
Fair use image downloaded from Wikipedia
The relationship to college applications
From the vantage point of a 2021 private college counselor, I think that our kids need MORE of these heartbreaking experiences, not fewer. Life is sometimes littered by disappointment. But if we allow that feeling to stunt our desire to commit to the next goal, we lose out on amazing experiences and future, eventual success.
As a private college counselor, I often goad students into adding “reach schools” on their college lists. Because they fear rejection, these students sell themselves short by applying to colleges only where they’re certain they’ll gain admission. Surely having enough target and safety colleges on your list are an important part of a holistic college application strategy. But underselling yourself at age 17 seems way too early to start living life halfway.
As a private college counselor, I wonder where those 2005 adolescents from Mad Hot Ballroom are now. I wonder if the girls became singing, dancing actresses as they’d dreamed of. I hope that the boys continued down the right path. Wherever they wound up, I’m certain that the success and the failure they encountered in that 2005 competition helped them along the way.